A Mother's Death, A Daughter's Tears

My mother died on 5/11/05 after fighting lung cancer for over 14 months. This blog will document my journey of coming to grips with the loss of the most important woman in my life.

Name:
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, United States

My real name is Kim and I live in Minneapolis, Minnesota USA. I am 44 years old, married, and have two step-daughters. I own five parrots & one dog, a Miniature Schnauzer. I have a pet sitting business http://parrotnanniesmn.com/.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

On being sick and alone

I have been really sick the last 24 hours with what I think is food poisoning. Friday night I went out with two girlfriends to a local Applebees for dinner after we got off work. Two of us ordered the same thing, and we all shared spoonfuls of ice cream from a chocolate ice cream Sunday. All three of us got sick with the same symptoms within a four hour time span late last night; vomiting, diarrhea, fever, cramps & constant stomach pain, and feeling so very weak. It seems really odd we'd all get sick at the same time with the same illness. We're going to call the restaurant tomorrow & let them know about it.

My brother called & asked me for $270 toward Mom's headstone....I wish I had the money right now but I don't. I do have money but I need it to make the house payment & for other bills as well. My husband still in a treatment center & so he's not bringing any income in, in fact he's draining it away with copays and such. He applied so SSDI but it can take up to four months before he'll find out if his claim is accepted.

My sister's pregnancy isn't going well. I guess a part of the placenta is pulling away from the wall of her womb, so they put her on total bed-rest for the next two week. I told my sister that she can call me anytime she likes to talk to me about things, to remember that I'm her big sister and I will always be there for her to the best of my ability.

Being really sick alone sucks. I miss having someone there to cuddle me & check up on me. Sometimes I have felt so dizzy that I couldn't get out of bed today to get to the bathroom in time...if my husband were here, he would have helped me. I miss him and I hope he's really working at getting better in the treatment center he's at. I really missed my mom through all of this too. I really could use her support right now, the kind words, the motherly advice on how to take care of myself. I really miss her lately while I've been going through the horrible situation of these last few weeks with my husband.

I am really feeling icky, so I'm going to bed. Good night all.