In sickness & health, missing Mom

I've been very sick the last week with a combination ear & sinus infection--so sick I missed a week of work, had three doctor's visits in the last week, and have been in bed most of the time. I have a history of very serious sinus problems that include bad allergies and two sinus surgeries. I'll be getting a CAT scan of my sinuses on Monday & will be seeing a new ear/nose/throat surgeon in a couple of weeks.

Anyway, in the past whenever my sinuses have gotten this bad and made me this sick, I've been able to call my Mom and talk to her. Hearing her voice always made me feel better mentally, if nothing else. My Mom understood how serious my sinus problems are and how depressed I'd get whenever they got so bad like the last week.

But Mom is gone now, dead over three months. I felt so alone the last few days, so isolated, so depressed. There is no way I can reach out to her and talk to her and be able to hear her voice right now, no way to feel her touch, or to see her face live and in person. The pain of this combined with being depressed over being so sick again had really pushed me near the edge the last few days. Not even my beloved parrots have been able to make me smile

Right now, what I wish the most for, is to have my Mom back, even if only for a few minutes, to listen to me & hold me. I'm a grown woman, yet inside there is still a little girl who longs for her mother's protection only now to find it totally gone. I feel as if I've been stripped of some vital layer of protection, both physical and mental.

I wish there was some way to make this pain go away, to quit feeling so depressed at times about her passing. I know there is no quick fix...is there?